Monday, 11 April 2011

How Times Have Changed

I realise after Ive read through this that its an incredibly personal post and many people wll cringe at the fact Ive put this on here, but I really dont care I find it theraputic to think back over stuff and write it down. If you dont want to hear me moaning on about missing people click away now haha xx

*All photos courtesy of my myspace account from 2008*

I was just reading through my Year 11 leavers book and looking on my old myspace account and its brought back all of the old memories of that time in my life, and made me realise how different my life is now.

I realise this is of no interest to anyone but I feel like writing it down. The friends that have wrote in this book saying all of these lovely things and writing down all of the good memories we had together, we would have thought we would never grow apart. If truth be told, a fair number of the people whove wrote those lovely messages, I said goodbye to them on the last day of school in floods of tears and have never seen them

when most the english class got a photo on the last day - Photo of im not gunna tag everyone, theyre all egends
Last day of school, the promises to all stay friends didnt last...

But its the closer relationships that have changed, developed, and some that have completely dissapeared that get me thinking the most.

when we were all extremely close in Brinkburn... by hayley campbell
I miss how we were known for being like sisters...

In school, there wasnt much of a great selection of boys in our year if Im honest, there was only a handful that were acceptable. Us girls used to panic and for some reason had it in our heads that this was it, we were never to find nice boys, ever. This made life incredibly difficult when you fall head over heels for the one person that everyone else has a crush on, and you have to put up with it constantly, this person will always be known as "the one that got away". Especially as there was a time when we rang each other for HOURS every day, which jsut didnt materialise, much to my dismay, but I guess everything happens for a reason?

me and adam at prommm in Prom... by hayley campbell
I promise I didnt have a gapped tooth...

This infatuation I had developed led me to "dump" my current boyfriend, who everyone whos ever met him will agree is an awful person. So at least something good came from it, and if I had never got rid of him and had "the one that got away" completely muck me around then I probably would never have met David. But I cant say that all 9 months was a total mistake because after all he did make me laugh and was lovely to me for the most part.

Its funny how things turn out, I then met David through a wierd connection of him being my friends, boyfriends, friend (if that makes any sense). This partcular friend at the time was literally the best friend I could think to have, because of an awful boy she now rarely sees me, and it really breaks my heart because that best friend connection we had is now gone. Had you told me this in school I would never of believed you.

I miss this the very most...

This strange stage of my life occoured when I left school, we befriended this group of lads because they knew her and her boyfriend, and David was one of them. There was also someone else who I had this thing for, and on the SAME DAY, they both asked me out. For a girl of 17 who has jsut got out of a ridiculous relationship with an overgrown toddler, this is too much to handle haha. Anyway I had my decision made for me by one of the lads who saw it was tearing me up, so I ended up with David who I had only met twice.

I know, Im crazy. But its the best decision Ive ever made.

And its not just with lads, these so many friends who Ive got to really like being around, even people like my Dad has had grilfriends and Ive made really good friends with them and their family and then they break up and its like Ive lost that whole group of people that I love. Its wierd and sometimes horrible the way things go

This post was kind of pointless, I was just reflecting on how people can be so important in your life for so long, and then they change, or they just leave for some reason, and sometimes you might miss them a lot, but it might seem wierd to just go "Hey, I miss you". Maybe these people go so they can be replaced by someone better, but sometimes it seems so pointless and your just missing someone so important to you.

I need to shut up now, but if anyone gets where Im coming from please comment so I dont feel like a total lunatic


1 comment:

  1. omg u r not a lunatic at all hun, it is weird how u have such strong friendships at school and think you will always be friends but then things change and you don't hear or see from those friends when u leave school, yetwhen u were there u thought would be friends forever xxx